As I entered into 2017, I felt the Lord ask me to work on one thing this year: to PAUSE. Pause is defined as “a temporary stop in action or speech” and while it’s easy to hit the pause button on my phone or computer… I’ve learned that it is REALLY hard to hit the pause button on my life.
If I’m being completely honest with you here, I entered 2017 with a lot of wants. I want to live closer to my family. I want a cozy home with a warm fire place. I want a job and a degree. I want to travel and see the world.
This question hit me like an arrow to the heart because I’m so quick to choose the world over the One who created it.
While I sat on my flight back to my life in Montana, God told me to stop and pause. In that pause, he asked me “Molly, what do you want more? Me or the world?” This question hit me like an arrow to the heart because I’m so quick to choose the world over the One who created it. These desires that I have are not bad (I’d say they’re pretty normal), but the one thing that each of those desires has in common is that they are linked to some sort of comfort. I spend over sixty hours a week in His Word and still I find myself choosing the comforts of the world rather than the promises my Father has given me to be my comforter, my refuge, my peace and my stability.
The Lord gently revealed to me what was in my heart – my idolization of what I do not have and my inability to wait patiently on His promises. The reason that this is so convicting is because I have tasted and seen that the Lord is good. I have seen Him heal broken bones, I have seen him grow out legs, I have seen Him baptize people in His love and I have seen Him speak to the hearts of people in Thailand who were seemingly unreachable. Through this heart check, the Lord asked that in my momentary pauses, I would look back on where He has been faithful and I’ve found that this list is never-ending.
I want to live in confidence that because He has been faithful, he will continue to be faithful.
The ways that I’ve seen God’s faithfulness in my life have left me with one desire that triumphs over them all and that desire is for more Jesus. I want to leave each week thinking, “Man, Jesus, you are SO much better than I thought you were!” I want to see the tiny glimpse of His plans that He’s revealed come into full picture. I want to live in confidence that because He has been faithful, he will continue to be faithful.
So as I pause, as I stop and take the time to listen to my Father, I am reminded that He is the King of perfect timing and His plans are seriously so much greater than mine. He restores and redeems. He is light and life. He is sustainer, creator, and friend. He brings reconciliation and forgiveness. He is worthy of my life and my time.
He is DEFINITELY worth pausing for.