Why does it always seem so difficult to trust God?
Recently, I was studying and teaching the book of Samuel. In this book, there is a strong contrast between the first two kings of Israel, Saul and David. In the heart of the book, we discover what separates these two individuals: that David is a man after God’s own heart and Saul is not. Now, that sounds really flowery and nice – maybe something you would find on a necklace at a Christian store – but what does that even mean? Is this only something to be written on a refrigerator magnet? Or does this mean something more? Well, looking at the story, we find that this probably means multiple things. David was a man of prayer, whereas Saul was not. David quickly came to repentance, whereas Saul only tried to save face. But what really struck me was that David was a man who trusted God.
I know that trusting God is something that I eagerly desire, but…trusting is the worst.
David was promised the kingdom in 1 Samuel 16, but had to trust God through the next 15 chapters while he is threatened and chased all over Israel by Saul (the rejected king). David even had opportunities to take Saul’s life, but he refused because he trusted that God would establish him as king.
Looking at this story, I know that trusting God is something that I eagerly desire, but…trusting is the worst. Let me explain what I mean here. It’s funny how God will often link what you are studying in the Bible with the experiences you are going through. Days before teaching this book, I was forced into a place of trust. I had spent several hundreds of dollars to fly out to go on a date with a girl. Things had been progressing nicely, and let’s just say I felt on cloud nine. This was going to be the best weekend that I could possibly have. One day later, I felt my hopes and expectations come crashing as it was ended after only the first evening. I was left stunned and with a series of questions: “God, what just happened?” “God, I felt like you were directing me towards this?” “God, why?” Everything hurt. Even as I prayed, I felt like God said that it was not for no reason that I went out there. All the while, though, I felt like a fool who spent all this money to get his heart broken. Aren’t there cheaper ways to do that? I was in my wilderness, like David.
Trusting God looks like having nowhere else to turn but to your Savior because your circumstances won’t deliver you.
It’s funny that when you need to trust God, you are usually in a place where life doesn’t feel good or comfortable or fun. It’s trusting God that left a 90 year old man with a barren wife promised that he would have a child that would bring him countless offspring. It’s trusting God that left an entire group of people in a desert while they had to wait for their promised inheritance. It’s trusting God that left a perfectly capable king running for his life while a mad man held the throne and sought to kill him. Trusting God is often something we revere. Don’t get me wrong, I think trusting God is always the best choice. But, the reason we usually need to trust God is because the circumstances are so hard. Trusting God looks like having nowhere else to turn but to your Savior because your circumstances won’t deliver you. When you find yourself needing God, then you get to watch as He comes through in ways you weren’t expecting. That’s when God is glorified.
I still have no idea why I had to go through all that heartache. But, digging into the circumstances, I found my Savior. Trusting in Him may at times feel difficult, but it’s also the best thing that I can do. And it’s the best thing that you can do.
For He is good, and His steadfast love endures forever!